Friday, July 4, 2025

Is This What Existentialism Feels Like?


Hi You,

You’re so interesting to me. I find you nothing short of captivating. Are you my foe? My enemy? My lover? You are everything all at once. My heart understands now. I understand why I’ve been waiting.. but the truth is I was never really waiting, I was just being, and that is beautiful. I understand now, that it was never about where I ended up, or who I ended up with (in any context of the word), but it was always about the destination. The journey IS the destination. For that reason I will love hard, each and every moment of it. There is no same second in this universe. It flows as it needs to. It expands, and I grow as I need to. The paradox is quite a lengthy one. You must live in order to understand. Or maybe you don't need to understand, and that is your journey. That is all we have; this second of existence. And this second. And this one. I must be in the moment. Whatever comes is not a challenge, but a blessing.


I forgot myself this whole time. I neglected myself. I will do this no longer. In order to love you I must love myself. In loving myself, I understand how much I love you. For you and I are one. 


I am alone in a universe I co-created. How did I never understand before that to be free I must give in? I must let the wind take me. And in that thought, I forgive myself. I forgive myself as that is all I had known at the time. I made the best out of what I had. Being alone is a blessing and a curse. I as Yasmeena am still navigating what that means for me, but I trust that the universe will lead me to where I need to be, in every moment. We must live in the moment as purely as we can. What do you leave behind if not your physical vessel? That is all - and then you become just a memory, and even those fade away.


We’ve been in autopilot you and I. We haven’t asked ourselves why we’re here. The real answer is, that we’re here for no reason. Do what you want, what you feel you need, but do it with purpose. Ironic right? What I’ve come to understand, is that you don’t need to understand. You just need to be. And to be is beautiful in itself. We chase and chase for what we want, but we already have it. You’re the whole damn world baby, and you better start believing that. 


Don’t think you need to see the beauty in everything, believe it. Believe that you see it, because you are it.


Why do we complain? Why do we hate ourselves? Why do we self inflict self suffering and harm? Let things happen, let them go and you will find peace. Face each challenge as it comes in every moment. Have that moment and let it go. Change the perspective and everything will shift for you. Each friend, a blessing. Each hardship, a gift. End your suffering. You are the universe experiencing itself, so experience it with peace and love. Love yourself more. For anything, I’m here with you, and you with me. Let’s just be, together. I’m holding you the way that you hold me. I love you, I love you, I love you. 


-Yasmeena… or whoever you want me to be








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